Sunday, October 20, 2013

Dick Cheney and John Rain


In an odd instance of life imitating art, it turns out then-Vice President Dick Cheney had his doctors turn off the wireless feature in his defibrillator, lest someone use the wireless feature to turn off the device itself.  Of course, John Rain fans have known about this vulnerability since at least 2002, when Rain first deployed it in A Clean Kill in Tokyo.

Interestingly, Cheney describes his fears as relating to the actions of potential "terrorists."  This is because, as we all know, if you kill a US official, it's terrorism, while when a US official does the killing, it's merely an "operation pursuant to a lethal authority" or a "kinetic action" or a "targeted killing."  Or sometimes, when we make an oopsy, it's "collateral damage."  Even bombing Syria wouldn't be a war -- as long as we're the ones doing the bombing.

As Mel Brooks said, "It's good to be the king."


In other exciting news, the incomparably oligarchical Senator Dianne Feinstein wants you to know that the NSA's call records program is "not surveillance."   So no need to be concerned.

1 comment:

shugyosha said...

So, when Rain does work for the government, he's a "lethal authority prosecution operator"?


"What's your job?"

"Oh, I'm a LAPO."

"A what?"

"A kind of government contractor."

"Oh, that. Say, wanna play tennis on Saturday?"